A poetic journey through my mind

‘Neath

skitter skitter in the depths,
chitter chitter little teeth,
black as night and whisper fast,
my brothers of the underneath.

bodies sleek and whippet quick,
clutch and tangle, swarm and scurry,
senses keen as sharpest razor,
warm the prey waits, hurry, hurry.

quickly strike and quicker feed,
tear and rend with bone-sharp teeth,
blind as midnight, you see all,
gods pity those who fall beneath.

4 responses

  1. scary!

    October 11, 2012 at 4:13 pm

    • KC

      *hugs* Not sure the rhythm quite meshes on this one. Storywise it’s fine, good and creepy…but I was trying to fit a bit of…background noise?…in, with the rhythm and sibilancy. Maybe trying too hard. I have that habit. 😉

      October 13, 2012 at 3:48 am

      • I tend to do that too but I think the rhythm is not as important as the content, my work often does not follow the correct rules of poetry but rules are made for breaking.
        Not long after I started my blog more than one person told me my work was neither nor but then a bright soul told me that it is ‘prosetry’ and that it was just fine!! So go with what you think is right, the reader can find their own rhythm but they need the feel and the story set out for them.

        October 13, 2012 at 7:15 am

Talk to me, people! ;)

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